Wednesday, May 16, 2007

Humble Return

It's been a while since I've been excited about running.

But it seems like the dental plaque that was growing on my hippocampus is finally receding. The 2007 Cross Country season is dawning, and with it comes the athletically motivated version of yours truly that we've all been missing.

I went running tonight with Kyle and James. Both of them are talking about running with the team as often as possible. Do you know how sick that'd be?

We've had a ton of girls sign on. Some of the best girls in the school are talking about running for us. Our team is not only going to be bigger than last year, it's going to be the very best team I've ever been a part of.

When I say best, I'm not talking about competition. I'm just talking about my team. Cross Country brings out the very best in the world. It's wholesome. There's so much love and power out there on those blessed mornings.

I've been thinking tonight about some things the past few days to make CC amazing this year. First and foremost will be team unity. I've got some cool ideas. There's definitely going to be a resurgence of the Tville CC Album. We're gonna be so ripped, it's going to be amazing.

I'm shedding the fat kid right now. I'm turning over a new leaf. It's time to improve. It's time to go out there and become the best me that I can become. It's not about times and performances: It's about me.

This team is going to take me to the tip of my existence. I honestly believe that through Cross Country, Seminary Council, Mads, and rigorous study next year, I can reach heights I've never dreamed of before.

The key is work. It's persistence. Not short bursts of work, but an over-riding theme: a habit of work and progress.

Here's to you, 2007 Cross Country. Let's take it to the stars.

-And now, a genuine decision by yours truly->

Friday night. I will play harder Ultimate than I've ever played before. I will tire myself out twice as fast as usual. I will sweat like Andrew. I will play both sides of the field one hundred percent. I will blend every part of my brain with my instincts and physical prowess. I will flow on that field like I've never flown before. All the beauty and simplicity of flow with an added touch of "Ohmygosh-how-did-he-do-that?!".

When 10 o'clock rolls around I will be drained and spent. I will play heart and soul from seven to 10. Substitutions are for squares. Iron man.

Will I be unstoppable? That's up to the opposing team. But know this, I'm gonna give them the most frightening night of Ultimate they've ever seen.

Sunday, May 13, 2007

Engage

I don't generally mind having a song stuck in my head. I never really understand people when they freak out about me singing something because they're going to get it stuck in their head. The only reason I'm singing it is because it's in my head and I like it.

Generally I love songs in my head. Not tonight though.

Because every time I try to think of something to start the post with, all I get is "Doooo dooo doooo, Doo Dooo do doooooo"

It's not even that cool of a song.

But it's alright. Because in the process of complaining about it, I've start the post.

So on we roll. Not because we must, but because we feel like it's the right thing to do.

I'm amazed at the power of cross country. Track officially ended a few days ago. We had the region meet, and that's the last meet of the season. Once that's over everything for me shifts to cross country. Training essentially starts as soon as track is over.

And boy oh boy, I can already feel the difference.

I didn't write much at all about track this year. I haven't written much of anything for a long time, actually. But that's not the point. Last year I talked about track a lot. I wrote about how I wanted to do, how I actually did, and why I loved it. I wrote about the charms and the discouragements, everything that made me think.

This year I couldn't really do that. Track and I didn't get along this year.

And maybe that's a story for another day. It's something I'm not really too proud of. I made a decision back in junior high that goes against the actions I took with track.

See, we're always in a process of shaping the people that we are going to be. Always changing, making small adjustments. We're finding ourselves. In the process of finding ourselves, we are truly making ourselves. There's nothing out there to find, there's only something to create on this path of 'finding ourselves'.

In junior high I saw some things that disappointed me. I decided that if I was going to do anything, I was going to do it well. I said that if I truly made the decision to pursue something, I was going to pursue it wholeheartedly. I was going to give it my all, not hold anything back.

That decision has brought me a lot of happiness since I made it. I do not follow it as often as I should. I love times when I make that decision though. I can see the difference, and I can still feel the difference weeks later.

On nights that I play Ultimate or basketball, you can always tell whether I've decided to go for it or not. When I make the decision that I'm going to give it my all, there's very little that can be done to stop me. That doesn't mean I'm going to win, it doesn't mean that I'm even going to play well.

But you can see it. I run faster, I jump higher. I literally try harder. It's not a psychological thing, and it's not a physical thing. It is everything rolled into one. My entire being is thrown into whatever I'm working at.

Oh yeah, it's good stuff. When I decide to truly pursue something, I pursue it pretty nice.

I did that with a lot of cross country last year. I know that I didn't do it with all of it, but for a large portion I did. I remember mornings when I woke up at 6:59, thinking that there was no way I could make it to practice in less than 60 seconds. I remember going back to bed, laying there and realizing that I was letting everybody and myself down. I remember that awesome feeling when I rolled out of bed at 7:03, knowing full well that I was three minutes late already. I booked it to school so fast that day.

I had slept too late to make it realistically, I knew that. I had a perfect excuse to go back to bed and miss that whole day of work. But I refused to. I got up and booked it to school. I made it right as they were leaving on the run. I got out and ran with them.

I was successful, and it was because of the choices I made that day. I made the right choice. I dedicated myself to it and I made it there.

It's like that. I made a goal last year to make it to every summer CC practice I could. I knew that it'd be hard; I knew what was on the line. But I made the goal, and I fulfilled. I think I slept through two practices on my own free will. Two out of about a million.

I am proud of how I worked during CC last summer. It's something that I can honestly take pride in. There's no question about it. I made good decisions last summer.

And that's what I want to shoot for in my life. If I'm going to do something, I'm going to do it well. I'm going to do it all the way. No compromises, no slacking.

Madrigals is one thing I want to apply this to. I am so excited to have made the group. It's an awesome opportunity. It's going to be so much fun.

But, straight off the bat I know I'm probably the weakest singer in there right now. That's not a bad thing, and I don't feel crappy about it. All it means is that I'm going to have to put more work into it.

And you know what? I'm going to. I'm going to bust it in there. I'm going to bring myself up to everybody else's level. I'm going to practice the songs. I'm going to stop chronically swallowing all my notes. With everybody else's help, I'm going to make myself a better singer. I can already see some results. I've been working these past few weeks, and I've been getting a bit of help from Levi and Kyle. I've got an honest desire to become better. It's already happening.

It's easy to talk big like that, sitting in the comfort of my office chair. My office chair doesn't ask me to exit my comfort zone. I'm not as consistent as I'd like to be. I see myself going through cycles of motivation and hard work to cycles of just getting by.

I've thought about that a little bit. What's the solution? Do I just try to maximize the accomplishments of my motivated times and minimize the time I spend lazy?

I don't think that's the answer. I think the answer is going to lie in changing the little things. I've tried the giant life altering approaches. When I'm motivated I'm really good at making plans and following through for a few weeks.

But those weeks eventually end, and I'm back to square one. So I'm trying something different. I'm making it a gradual, day by day thing.

I once had the plan to walk around everywhere on my tip-toes. The concept was that doing so would greatly improve my calf strength, and that'd increase my vertical jump by about a million. I'd finally be able to dunk.

I eventually developed shin-splints and stopped, but the concept is something that I want to apply everywhere. I thought of the plan like this: since I'm always walking, if I could change my walk just a little bit so that walking would help me improve, I'd always be improving. If I was always improving, my life would just keep getting better and better.

The plan wasn't to go do a raging calf workout every day. I wasn't going to hit the gym or power through an insane jump-rope workout. I was just going to walk around on my tip toes.

And that's how I've got to approach life. Yeah, the big stuff is important. But it's the day to day that makes us who we are. It's the day to day that changes the results in the long run. Sure, you can buy your mom a car once you're thirty, but being nice to her every day of your life is going to mean a whole lot more to her than the automobile.

So that's the plan. Make every day mean something. Make it make me a better person. It doesn't have to be big. Most days it probably won't be. But if I can make a real small difference in the world every day, after a while I've suddenly made a crater of goodness.

This theory of life goes along great with flow theory.

Unfortunately, I seem to have forgotten the intricacies of flow theory. I never did write it all down. I have the main concept behind it, and I do remember what taught it to me. I'll have to go on a quest this week to rediscover it. It was a good one, and although I didn't apply it as far as I would have liked to, it worked well.

I've often thought about what I could do to make something better. What I could to do to make the blog better, what I could do to become a better ultimate player.

I have a strong belief that desire is the key factor in everything that we do. The scriptures talk about it as it relates to faith, and the application spreads to everything else that we do. Once we have a desire to do anything, we can let that desire work within us to make it happen.

Which, really, is totally awesome.

Because simply by desiring to become a better Ultimate player, I firmly believe that that in itself makes me just a little bit better. Whether or not I end up leveraging that desire to find a way to become better, the simple desire completes half the task for me.

Desire is critical in everything that we do.

You can change days and you can change hours, but in the end its your life that's going to matter. The little things are the real variables here.

I think the key to really figuring the little things out is to consciously evaluate your day. Evaluate your decisions as you make them. Too often I find myself in auto-pilot, doing things just because. Not really for any reason, and not because I want to do them, but just because that's the way that I do things.

But if we'll stop and consider what's happening, if we'll give honest thought to what we're doing, we're gonna find things going a lot better for us. We're going to be happier, and people around us are going to be happier as well. We're going to be more successful.

I subscribe to the concept of individualism. I believe that we make the choice between greatness and mediocrity.

Everybody has natural talents that can take them to mediocrity. Everybody, I think, will default to neutral if they let themselves live long enough.

But it takes something extra on the person's part to truly reach greatness. The person cannot simply live life because there is nothing else to do. That person must rise up and make good decisions. That person must work and toil and become all that they can become.

That's the kicker. Are we waking up because we stopped sleeping, or are we waking up because there's something waiting for us out there? I'm ready to stop just letting life happen, and I'm ready to go face the world with a purpose.

I want to be great. I want to take it to the top. I'm going to do it with singing. I'm going to do it with school. I'm ready to do it with Cross Country. Yeah, I'm gonna start walking around on my toes. Maybe it'll tear my feet up, maybe it'll screw up some tendons. I don't really know, but I'm willing to give it a shot for a while. If problems develop I'll stop.

The point is, I'm setting out. Not on an epic quest. But rather on a slight course adjustment. I'm going to live my life, but I'm going to maximize the progress I make by doing so. When I go on a walk, I'm going to go on a walk to get somewhere.

"We're taking this thing to the moon!" -Strongbad

Thursday, May 10, 2007

Fighting for the Post

I feel like a sports star sitting on the bench because of a broken ankle. I want to get out there and play so bad, but I'm restricted by a giant plaster boot around my favorite limb.

I want to sit and post and run forever. But there's an AP history test tomorrow, and I'm going to bank on this one and take myself a good full night's rest.

It's like I've been away for a long time. I'm trying to come back to camp, but conflicts keep getting in my way. One more battle to fight, one more river to cross.

One day I'm going to get there. One day I'm going to sit down and run forever. One night, soon, I'll let myself out onto this pixelated parchment, and for just a moment the post and I will be totally aligned. There will be no question about where I stand or how I feel that night. The purity and essence of the thoughts I have will be, for a brief moment, synchronized in two separate locations. The feeling of being entirely and unequivocably correct at two distinct geographies is one of the better feelings ever.

What's the news? I'm searching for Fresh. It's close. I'm trying to remember to quest and flow and be strong. I'm trying to make the best decisions. I'm trying to excel and make the most of the gifts and opportunities I have.

How is it coming? It's a never ending battle. The question isn't with ability or power or resolve. It's a matter of desire and consciousness.

We all have the power to make good decisions when we think about it. When we want to do what's right, we're given divine liberty to do so with greater power than we ever have otherwise. The desire to dominate, the desire to take ourselves to the next level, that's what it's going to take.

What's the news?

The news is up to you. Your news; your life. You are making the calls. You're the only thing making the difference between you and the next level. Where are you gonna stand?

Who are you gonna be?

Saturday, May 05, 2007

Amateur-crastinate

Foiled again.

But worry not, I shall emerge victorious at last.

Why? Because that's how I roll.

I've got 11 minutes to write before Noakesy gets here so we can go down to the BYU invitational. I'm actually pretty excited for it. I'm only running one event, and I don't have to help put anything away afterwards. It's a win-win situation.

So, you'll notice that I promised a good post. I hold by my promises, even if they have to be delayed a little bit. There will be a good post. If not today, then tomorrow. If not tomorrow, sometime in the relatively near future.

But in order to make that good post happen, I'm going to need a little help. If there are any questions out there, anything you guys really want to see me write about, let me know. I'm not going to say that this will be a questions post, because I'm going to write something awesome whether or not you actually leave any questions or comments, I'm just opening up in the event that anybody has anything in particular they want to read about.

Predictions for tonight's game: Jazz by Four.

Predictions for tonight's other game: Me by a million.

Literary Magazine is essentially finished. That's a big sigh of relief right there. It's going to be really awesome this year, I think we did an excellent job on production. It looks pretty professional. Buying one would be a good idea, but if you don't have 20 dollars to throw at a book then don't.

The whole concept behind the literary magazine is awesome. Collecting all the best writing and artwork of the students of Taylorsville high into one awesome compilation? It's essentially a portrait of what Taylorsville thinks about during '06 and '07.

I'm in love with the idea of collecting awesome writing and ideas. That was essentially the idea behind the Taylorsville Alliance from who-knows-how-many months ago.

I think the Literary Magazine is going to be good, but not as good as it should be. No matter how awesome we do on production, we still rely entirely upon the writing of the students. It's not that good writing isn't out there, and it's not like we don't have amazing writing in the book. We've got some excellent work in there, we just don't know enough.

Next year I'm going to spam the .... Noakes is here. Cya later tonight.

Friday, May 04, 2007

Integrate Force on a Spring

*edit*

Good post coming tomorrow morning:D. It's 2:59 AM. So, no writing tonight. Tomorrow morning I hope.

In addition, I kicked Michael's butt at soul calibur.


And you'll get potential energy.

Good post coming tomorrow. In the meantime, my ceiling fan.