Pardon me if I've used that title before.
I've got some beef with the whole world. A bone to pick if you will. Something has upset me greatly.
I just finished watching most of "Grease" with my dear mother. It was on ABC Family. At the end of the show, I had no choice but to mimic the words of the ever wise comic-book-guy.
"Worst Episode Ever."
"I shall register my disgust upon the internet."
And here I am. Registering my disgust upon the internet.
Holy crap! How did that thing ever gain main-stream acceptance! I had never seen it before now, and now I know why! Who in their right minds would think that was a good idea? The whole show is swimming with nothing but extremely hateable characters and innuendo! There isn't simply no moral to the story, there's a freakin' anti-moral!
"Oh hi, I'm sandy, I used to be attractive. I was the good character in the show, the one you were rooting for. I'm the only character you don't hate. I'm not a skank"
"...Oh wait! End of the movie's coming up. I was about to teach you all a great moral about how you should be true to yourselves and do what's right and things will work out. I was going to be the poster girl for being wholesome. But, since there's only 5 minutes left, I need to go and dress like a skank and smoke and all that stuff so the boys will like me. I'm going to ruin the one good character we had. Let's go get drunk."
Oh great. Real good. How in the world is this thing still on the air? Fine, I know it was broadway and all that. But how come they just showed the movie? Huh? Why ABC Family, why?
Anybody who has ever said that simpsons was worse than that is insane. The whole show is run by innuendo! I mean really now, where's the point in the whole thing anyways?
Granted, I missed the middle half of it. Frankly, I'm glad that i did. I might have lost more brain cells.
"We are all now dumber for having watched that"
I'm upset. All my life I've known it was popular, it was some cultural thing. Everybody recognized it. I didn't, I'd never seen it.
And now I have, and I gotta wonder, how, how did this become a cultural icon? Why is it even recognizable? It shouldn't have ever gotten past the drawing board. There's no way it should be a classic. I don't even think it should be in the bargain bin at wal-mart!
This thing makes Ted Stevens look like a moral giant, a brilliant and eloquent orator!
The anti-moral at the end makes Brough's lectures look timid!
Two RAGING thumbs down for Grease. It wasn't just not good, it was bad. There's a bold and strong line between lacking anything good and being craptastic on purpose. Who wrote that crap? Who thought it was a good idea? Who gave that man a budget?!
In conclusion, I'm pretty sure that Grease takes the cup for worst cultural icon that I've never seen until now. Move over Peter Pan's What makes the red man red.
Sunday, July 29, 2007
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