Monday, September 24, 2007

12:57 AM

Happy Sunday everybody, I hope you're doing well.

I just finished my English essay. I love first drafts.

It's not that good, but it's finished. It's not what one would expect. It doesn't have the required poetry cited in it. It's barely over two pages long.

Really, it's not a good "essay"

But the ideas in there are beautiful. The idea, the core, it's solid. I could stand up in front of the class and give a five minute diatribe on why I am right.

I think I tried to do that with the essay. I used my flow of speech style of writing. The one with the random comma's. I think it's a combination of the great speakers I've heard in my life. Scriptures, SNL celebrity jeopardy, Stephen Colbert. Throw them all together and you get a whack essay that is better heard than read.

It will undergo a radical revision come Tuesday. Until then I'll take my credit with a smile.

Yeah, it's 1 AM. It's looking too late to write an epic post. It's looking too late to read C+P or practice all state. But that's ok, because I'm alive, and as far as I know I'm still moving.

Perhaps there will come a day in the near future (we're talking days here) that I will have to make sacrifices to make things work. Right now I'm sacrificing All State and C+P to finish my homework. I do need to stop that.

Tomorrow I'm going to work hard. I'm going to work hard to ride my bike to school. I'm going to work hard in school. I'm going to work hard after school. I'm going to watch Heroes. And then I'm going to work hard and then go to bed.

It's not that I don't have enough time. I just haven't risen to the challenge quite yet.

My entire essay was really about that challenge, that quest. The main jist is that I'm a man on a quest, and poetry is just poetry. I have eternal worth and value, my potential is limitless. I'm running through everything here trying to be better. Poetry is just poetry.

And therefore poetry should not be idol-worshipped for what it is not. Poetry is a tool that man uses. It is a very good tool. It can help men on their quest. That is where its value comes in.

Not in it's being. Not in it's world. It's value is in the fact that it can help people. Poetry is beautiful because of it. I have love for poetry because of it. I do love poetry.

But then again, I love shovels. And you don't hear me raving about shovels, do you?

But I could rave about shovels. Maybe, to be fair, I will one day.

I don't hate poetry by any means. I love poetry. I just don't believe that poetry is the most important thing. You and I, we're the important things. Poetry can help us. We can't help poetry. Poetry can't be helped at all. It's just there, inanimate. But you and I are living and moving beings, we're on a quest and we need all the help we can get.

It's a deep breath, but I'm loving it. It's fresh, and fresh is what I'm after.

The weather is changing. I love when the weather changes. I think it goes back to human nature. We're all about changing. We have a very hard time noticing the way things are. We're built to notice when things change. When we talk about physics and kinematics we find out that the earth is hurtling along at millions of miles a second in its orbit around the sun. You'd think we'd feel that kind of motion.

But we don't, yet we can feel the slightest acceleration one way or the other. We are all about acceleration. As far as we know, if we aren't changing, we simply are not.

That's how I am about the weather. I like the rain because it's a departure from the normal. It's a new opportunity to see and explore the world, because all the sudden it's an entirely different world out there. A world with rain is nothing like a world without rain. I love the change.

Stalwart. I think stalwart is a good word. Something I'd like to be. I wouldn't mind having that on a headstone, would you?

There are certain words like that. Words that you would always feel honored to be called. I get the feeling that everybody except the very confused still love and respect those words. I think everybody still knows, deep down, that old school virtue will win us all. There's nothing cooler than old school virtue. "That guy was so loyal, that guy was so steady. That guy was stalwart, that guy had courage. That guy was nice to everybody he met."

When I'm looking for adjectives to be, I think I've found the list that I want to pursue. What's cooler than old school virtue?

1 comment:

Courtney said...

stalwart is a good word. :D

congrats on your essay. i have to write one tonight. wish me luck!